Half Forgotten Interlude
by arian
Summary: Set back when Laguna, Ward and Kiros were in the army. It's sort of... bizarre, but it's not like I'm making anyone read it... If you can't stand original characters, steer clear of this one.
1. Default Chapter Title

Half-Forgotten Interlude.

By Arian.

Authors' note – There really is so much I can say about this fic that I can't fit it all in a little note like this. There's quite a history behind some of this (sort of…). The first important thing I have to say is that this is a _very_ bizarre story. In fact, it's more of a conversation than a story. Anyway, you have been warned, but please read it to the end before you get too scared and think I'm insane. This fic was originally intended to explain something that I wanted to put in Reviresco, but didn't. Incidentally, it turned out that it's not in this fic after all. This fic is in no way connected to Reviresco or the other two fics in that little trilogy. And it's taken me a long time to decide whether to post it here and open myself up to reviews. Now it's up and all the unintentional sequels can follow. There are lots of them, believe me.

The second thing is that the girl in the story is NOT me. The name is the same, but she really _isn't_ me. You'll see why I'm making this point later. However, bits of her personality are very much like me… I think I gave her my sense of humour (poor girl!).

I'll stop now and let you read the rest in peace. Please review, good or bad. I'm really anxious to know what you think about it.

"So it _is_ you!" the woman exclaimed on entering the room. It was much the same as all the rooms in the building, with that strange, futuristic feel to it that instantly marked it as Estharian.

The single occupant of the room looked up in surprise, black hair tumbling into his eyes.

"I heard stories and I just _knew_ that there couldn't be two people with that name." She continued by way of explanation. "I thought I'd stop by, just to see what the place was like. It's rather different to where we last met. I'm glad!"

Laguna laughed. "I should have known you'd turn up sooner or later. I heard the town had been totalled, but you just didn't seem the type to go down that way."

"Yeah. Good riddance to the dump. My brother went down with it." She said smugly. "I hoped he would."

"What do you do now? Where do you live?" Laguna asked curiously.

"I hang around Timber mostly, dabbling in the resistance groups just like everyone else. It's very much to my taste." She laughed and Laguna recalled that he had never heard her laugh before. She had never had anything to laugh about.

"Do you still…?"

Her laughter pealed out through the room again and she shook her head.

"No. Like you told me, revenge is a hollow, empty thing and I don't need it anymore. Even if it was still a necessity for me… He's dead now. There's nothing else I can do. I've worked my way up in the world, but then, up was the only available direction."

She pulled something out of the pocket of her long skirt and deposited it on the table. "You left these. I thought I'd better return them."

"You _seriously_ kept them for twenty odd years?" he asked, incredulity showing in his green eyes. "You should have thrown them out."

"Not mine to throw out." She countered. "No one could ever call me a thief. They called me a lot of other things, but never that."

"_I_ never called you anything."

"No. _You_ wouldn't." She smiled, her blue eyes twinkling outrageously and an impish grin crossing her lips. "You know, it's almost a pity, because then you might've…"

"What?"

"Nothing. Don't worry about it." 

***************

"Finally! I thought we'd never get here." Kiros breathed in relief. He looked around at the town and instantly decided that he didn't like it. It wasn't one of the more picturesque places they'd ever been to, that's for sure.

In the centre of the town were a small group of stone buildings that looked halfway decent, but the rest of the place consisted of low-roofed wooden shacks, leaning precariously against each other. It looked like one strong gust of wind would topple the place, like dominoes. 

The people they passed in this outer part of town were worn down and bedraggled, a lack of hope in their eyes. Many simply sat on the side of the street, holding their hands out for anything that passers-by saw fit to give them. 

Kiros wondered why some of them didn't just pack up and go to Deling City, or somewhere where they stood a chance of getting a proper job.

"Cheerful sort of place."

"Yeah, but are you sure this is the _right _place?" Ward asked, a grin spreading slowly across his battered face. 

"Good point. Well, I guess we'll find out soon enough. _Why_ do we let him lead us around like this?" Kiros asked in exasperation, glancing back at their companion, who trailed behind somewhat. "We _know_ he always gets us lost."

"Shh! He's bad enough on the self-confidence front as it is. Besides, he's the leader and you know what Galbadia's like with the whole obeying orders thing."

"Maybe we could subtly point out signs and stuff next time. You know, drop hints." Kiros brightened up.

"You'd _never_ get his attention with subtlety." Ward laughed.

"True." Kiros glanced back at Laguna again. "Oh, I don't believe it! Surely he knows better than to –"

"What?" Ward turned as Kiros walked back to where Laguna stood at the side of the street and dragged him forwards.

"_Why_ are you giving them money?"

Laguna looked at him, amazement registering on his face. "Whaddya mean? Look at 'em. They need it."

"They're not starving. Not one of them is skin and bones, so they must get fed. Most of them are probably frauds anyway, too lazy to do anything else." Kiros hissed in a low voice. "And now we're probably going to get mugged."

"Relax! That wouldn't happen! Even if it does, we can handle it." He paused. "_And_ we're at the right place! I told ya."

"It's a miracle." Kiros muttered under his breath as Laguna walked back to the side of the road.

"Leave him be." Ward rumbled, good-naturedly.

"That's all well and good, but how's he gonna pay for anything? _We'll_ end up footing the bill, I know it."

Ward nodded. "You wouldn't leave a friend to starve, would you Kiros?"

"No. But I think we should kick him out of the hotel room. He can sleep on the street with this lot." Kiros let an evil grin travel across his face.

"You wouldn't really do that. You wouldn't dare to let him loose out here by himself because he'd probably cause chaos."

"Ah, you mother him, Ward." The other man groaned. "And he's the oldest of the lot of us. Oh no! Please tell me that's not _next_ month's pay packet I see! _Two_ months, Ward! We're gonna have to lend him money for two months!" Kiros bemoaned the loss of a sizable chunk of his wages.

A short distance ahead, a girl stood at the roadside. Something in her demeanour made her stand out from the rest. Perhaps it was the way she stood tall and straight-backed, unafraid to look anyone in the face, or it could simply have been the colour of her hair, shining gold against the dreary browns and greys around her. The skirt and blouse she wore were tattered and where they had once been blue, they were now a faded grey. Despite the bored look on her face and the apparent youth of her features, Kiros and Ward didn't have any trouble recognising her profession.

Laguna put some money in her hand and walked after his friends, who were trying to locate the hotel.

The girl stared down at her palm incredulously, then her eyes narrowed and she threw the coin after Laguna. He turned as it bounced off his shoulder and watched as it rolled into the gutter, where about five others scrambled for it. He looked back at her, questioningly.

"I _work_ for what I earn!" She yelled after him. "I don't want charity! I don't care what I am, I have pride, too!"

Laguna walked back to her and started to ask what work she did but Kiros grabbed his shoulder and pulled him away.

"I can't believe you asked that." Kiros chuckled.

"What? _What?_ Kiros, what _does_ she do?" Kiros just laughed again and Laguna finally caught on, helped by the smirk his friend was directing at him. A pink colour travelled slowly up his face. "Oh."

"It's almost worth parting with what it's gonna cost me to feed you for two months, just to see that look on your face. " Kiros managed through his laughter, enjoying himself immensely.

"Yeah. Very funny." Laguna muttered sourly and opted for a quick change of subject. "So where's this hotel?"

"My guess would be that large stone building across the street, with the great big letters plastered across the front saying "Hotel", strangely enough." Ward smiled.

"Oh. Right. I saw that. I _did_!" Laguna protested, trying to preserve what was left of his somewhat tattered dignity. Ward just gave Kiros a knowing nod and a wink while Laguna's back was turned.

***************

"Um, 'scuse me, but I think we have a room booked here." Laguna leaned over the reception desk.

The woman sat there looked up. "Name?"

"Whaddya reckon they booked it under, guys? Well, let's go for Galbadian military at the moment." He paused, uncomfortably. "See, the thing is, we're a little late."

"This could be it." The receptionist stopped leafing through a large book and traced her finger under one of the entries. "Three of you?"

"That's it."

Her eyes widened and she looked up again. "Two _days_ late?"

"We got lost. Again." Ward put in.

"But, sir, the town is well sign posted all the way from Deling City."

"Yeah, but Laguna here doesn't believe in road signs." Kiros laughed, despite a very unhappy look from Laguna.

"Well, it's no problem. No one comes here much, so we don't get that many people checking in. Here's the key. Up the stairs, second on the right."

***************

"Damn! That's the third game I've lost." Kiros groaned as Ward cleared the Triple Triad cards off the table, handing the other man's cards back to him.

"You're not concentrating, and you've been in a foul mood. What's the problem?" The big man looked astutely at his friend.

"Ah, it's just this place! It gets me down. It's all so dull and lifeless." Kiros threw his hands in the air and leaned back in his chair.

"You won't have to put up with it much longer. We're only here until midday tomorrow, right Laguna?"

When there was no response, Ward turned. Laguna was sat by a window, where he had been since the card game had started, his chin resting in his hand. His gaze appeared to be fixed on something outside that Ward couldn't see.

"He's not listening." Kiros said flatly.

"Laguna?" Ward tried again, slightly louder.

"Yeah…?" A vague reply drifted over from the direction of the window.

"He's still not listening. That's just automatic. I'll get his attention." Kiros said, with a slightly malicious grin. He got up and walked softly until he stood just behind Laguna, then leaned down.

"Laguna!" he yelled and watched as his friend practically leapt out of his chair and spun round.

"Dammit Kiros, did ya _have_ to do that? I think I'm deaf in one ear now." Laguna complained.

"Just trying to get a response. We _are_ leaving tomorrow, aren't we?"

"Yeah. Bit of a wasted journey by the time we got here, but we're only to check that there haven't been any raids on the place. You know what it's like at the moment, Galbadia's lookin' for any excuse to launch an attack on Esthar."

"Another war. What fun." Kiros replied in monotone. He glanced briefly out of the window. "Hey, there's that girl. The one that helped you make a fool out of yourself earlier."

Laguna let that one pass. "I know." He said quietly.

Kiros shot a quick look at Ward, raising an eyebrow, then looked back at Laguna.

"Why, Kiros?" Laguna burst out suddenly. "Look at her, she's about five years younger than us! Why does she do it?" 

Kiros shrugged.

"How can they all just walk past her?"

"What good would it do to stop? You saw her attitude to the goodwill of others." His friend countered.

"She's so young!" He insisted again. "Why doesn't she –"

"Maybe you should ask her." Ward put in.

Laguna stood silent for a moment, then nodded slowly. "I'm going out." He said, and Kiros laughed softly as Laguna closed the door.

"He took you seriously?"

"Looks like it."

"What about what you said earlier? About him causing chaos?" Kiros questioned.

"Well, I figured the place is such a dump, no one'll notice anyhow." Ward commented, picking out his cards for another game of Triple Triad.


	2. Default Chapter Title

Half Forgotten Interlude 

Part 2

By Arian

Laguna stepped out onto the street, having managed to get to the hotel door in one piece, but only just. His leg had cramped up while he was walking down the stairs and he had nearly fallen the rest of the way down.

_Kiros and Ward would've been laughing about that for weeks._ He reflected, glad that they hadn't been there.

Spotting the girl he had encountered earlier, he walked across the street towards her. Her expression was distinctly unimpressed and she ignored him, her eyes staring in the opposite direction.

"Hey. Remember me?"

The girl turned her head slightly and fixed him with a cold glare. "Yes. What?" she said, shortly.

"I just wanted to talk to you for a while. Is that alright?" he ventured.

"No. It's not alright. Talk is not my trade, I don't get anything out of it and you might scare away my customers." She tilted her head and gave him a speculative look. "_You're_ not a customer, are you?"

"No." Laguna said quickly.

"Then leave me alone. Go away."

He thought for a moment, looking for a way to talk to her and get a civil answer. He had no idea why, but he felt a deep curiosity about this girl and her circumstances. She didn't appear at all like the other unfortunates that hung around the edges of the streets. There was something different to her and he wanted to know what it was and why it was there.

He drew in a deep breath. "I could be."

Her head snapped back towards him and a worn look crossed her face for a moment.

"Follow me." She said wearily, leading him a short way through the back alleys to one of the tiny wooden buildings that made up such a large proportion of the town.

She opened the door and motioned him inside.

"Don't you lock the door?" He asked, surprised.

"What's the bloody point? A determined worm could bash its way through, so why bother?"

There was only the one small room, from what Laguna could see. The light was bad, but he could make out a basin, a bed and a few drawers and cupboards scattered about the place.

The girl drew a packet of matches out of her pocket and struggled to light a lamp, cursing softly as the match burned down to her long fingers.

The yellow light that filled the room didn't particularly improve the way it looked. It was the same dreary shade of browns and greys that cursed the whole town.

"I just want to talk to you." Laguna said, a little uncomfortably.

The girl looked up from the basin, where she had been washing the grime off of her hands and face. Drying her hands on a cloth, she turned to face him.

"You pull me in off the street to _talk_?" she asked ominously. "I could be earning money out there!"__

"It's OK!" _What the hell have I gotten myself into now?_ "You still are! I mean, I'll reimburse you, or whatever."

"Talk is not my trade," She repeated again, crossly. "And words do not have a value that money can place on them. They are too important for that."

"Please. What harm can talking do? You're here now, you might as well stay here."

"How much?" She asked dubiously.

"Whatever you think." Laguna told her, praying he had filched enough from Kiros earlier.

"You're _seriously_ paying to _talk_ to me?" She said, slightly baffled. "You're insane!"

"Humour me."

"Oh sure, you're the paying customer. Your wish is my command." She drawled sarcastically, with a short curtsy. "What do you want to talk about?"

"Well, I guess a name would be nice, to start with."

"My name? Arian." The girl replied warily.

"Arian. OK, I'm Laguna Loire, currently working for the Galbadian Army. Do you have a last name?"

"No." She said flatly. "Not anymore." The girl, newly identified as Arian, sat on the edge of the bed, lifting one foot up to her knee and pulling her shoe off.

"My feet ache. I've been standing on the street all day." She commented softly, trying to massage some life back into her foot.

"Why do you do… what you do?" Laguna burst out suddenly, finally asking the question he had wanted to ask.

"Why am I a whore? Don't be so afraid to say it. I'm not." She looked away from him, once more paying all her attention to her sore feet. "It… suits me. That's why."

Laguna shook his head, remembering the weary expression on her face. "No, I'm not buying that."

"I need the money." She tried, sighing angrily, returning her foot to the floor and looking up.

"There are other ways to earn money."

"What? Beg on the street? I will not do that. As for trying to get another job…" she paused. "Look, I have my reasons."

He sat down next to her and Arian turned to look at him, tilting her head to one side, her long hair falling over one shoulder. "Next topic of conversation?" She asked.

"I'm not finished with this one yet. What are your reasons?"

"Well, you're persistent, I'll give you that. My reason? Revenge." A cold fire filled her face and eyes. "Revenge for an insult, among other things. Why did you speak to _me_? Why did you want to know about _me_?" Arian asked suddenly, the yellow light of the lamp bouncing off her pale skin, giving it a sickly cast.

"I don't know." Laguna answered honestly. "Maybe because you were different, who knows?"

"Different?" She smiled. "Yes, I'm certainly different."

"Tell me. Please."

She nodded slowly. "I don't think anyone knows the full story, apart from me. I'm not sure. How much do you know about this town, Laguna?"

"Absolutely nothing."

She frowned, trying to find a place to start. "Well, there are a couple of old families here. You know the sort, the ones with the coats of arms and such, who can trace back their family tree and tell you that their great-great-great grandfather was once King of Centra or something. My family was one of those. I lived in one of those big stone houses, once. It seems like an eternity has passed since then." She gave a wistful sigh.

"Why did you leave?" Laguna questioned.

"Give me a chance. I'm getting to that." She chided, before continuing on with her story.

"The wealth of the old families here is based on trade of commodities. All sorts of stuff. I don't know exactly what, it never interested me enough to find out.

"My father had managed the business but he died a couple of years ago." She shrugged. "It made little difference to me. I didn't know him that well. My mother was so vague she was of little help, so my brother ran the business. He was about 24 then. The other old families made a lot of fuss about trading with someone as young as he was. They made a lot of excuses, but they were just trying to get him to lower his prices.

"It's always been that way. The families bicker and quarrel, taking sides against each other. Their lives are full of intrigue and plots, with the occasional murder, but they could never see how their arguments affected this town. They made it the way it is now. It wasn't always so. I used to see pictures of how it used to be and I wanted so badly to make it better. I wanted my family to make it better." A bitter look crossed her face. "They wouldn't listen to me. In all other respects my life was a good one – I was granted almost anything that I wanted – but my opinions were unimportant to them.

"All that had been boiling inside me finally came to a head when my brother wished to make a strong alliance with one of the other houses. Deciding that blood was thicker than water, he asked me if I'd be willingly to marry to seal the agreement." Arian paused and turned from Laguna to stare into the space in front of her.

"Do you know what that felt like? To be asked that?" She shook her head. "Don't get me wrong, I know he'd have never forced me into it, but it showed me something. It showed me that they didn't know me and I felt completely detached from them."

"So you said no?" Laguna asked.

"Like Hell I did! _He_ didn't seem to mind too much but _I _was really angry, so a full-scale argument ensued. I think I started it when I told him I didn't intend to marry anyone, let alone one of his business associates. I told him that I already loved someone and naturally he asked who. This was the problem. I knew exactly who it was, but he just didn't buy it. He couldn't comprehend the notion."

"Who was it?"

"What difference does it make to you?" Arian asked suddenly, not quite angry, but her tone was sharp. "You don't know him, you don't even know me." She stopped, hearing the words that she had poured out and not liking them. "Look, I'm sorry. I guess I'm still a little uptight about it all. It's not something I'm used to talking about."

Laguna just stared at her after her outburst, wondering what answer he would have given to her question. Why _did_ this matter to him? He shook his head to dispel that. Deep philosophy was not his strong point and he wasn't going to get himself tangled up over asking a question he didn't know the answer to.

"Who?" Arian repeated his earlier question. "I was in love with a dead man. I still am." She said softly.

"He died? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to –"

"No." She cut in quickly. "You misunderstand. I never knew him. He died before I was even born." Her voice was so quiet it was barely a whisper, and although her eyes were dry, the sound of tears was in her voice.

"I don't understand." Laguna said patiently. "How could you possibly love him?"

"If I could explain it, I would. I knew _about_ him and I guess… Oh, I don't know. I've tried to rationalize it to myself, but I can't. The fact remains that I fell so hard that nothing has ever been able to change it. If there is a Hell, then this is it. Nothing I can do will bring him back. My life's joy was ended before it even started.

"My brother called me insane and disowned me. I was thrown out of the house without anything, only the clothes on my back. It frightened him, you see. _I_ frightened him. He didn't know what to do.

"I suppose I could have got what you would call a decent job, but I was so very angry that he'd thrown me out, and that he was frightened of me, that I wanted to humiliate him. I wanted to make him suffer and for some reason, I decided this was a good way to do it. It's bizarre, but it's working. Most people refuse to trade with him on principle, claiming that they have moral standards. The family business is going down and it's dragging him into the gutter with it." A coldly satisfied smile crossed her face.

Laguna held up a hand, signalling for her to stop, and passed his other hand across his eyes.

"Ok, can we just go back a bit? I'm really confused."

"Sure. You're the paying customer."

"Will you stop with that?" he asked uncomfortably, shifting where he sat. "What I wanted to know was – hang on, what's this guy's name, the de-" He stopped short, realising that wasn't the best thing he could say.

She smiled, already guessing what the word would have been. "Do you have some kind of name obsession, or something? First, my name, now you're asking for his name." She groused, good-naturedly. "Gwydion. That was his name. Happy?"

"Yeah. That makes it easier. I like to have names for people. I was just going to ask how you manage, how you can keep waking up in the morning."

"Good question." Arian smiled ruefully. "It just happens. In spite of everything, there is still so much I want to see and do. I'm loath to leave life with so much unfinished. But I wait, because one day it _will_ happen. I _won't_ wake up. It's almost turned into an obscure kind of dream of mine."

"You're crazy!" Laguna laughed suddenly. Not _at_ her, but more as if it were a joke they shared.

"Oh yes." She nodded solemnly, a twinkle in her eye that made it look almost as if she were laughing, too. "I'm crazy, but not insane, like they told me I was. I am not insane."

"No," he agreed, "if you were insane you wouldn't use such long words."

"Ah, I forget you're only a soldier." She grinned. "Shall I stick to nice easy words, less than two syllables?"

"Please do." Laguna ran through the conversation and picked out his next question. "So where does this revenge thing come in? You're doing this to get back at your brother, but how does this make the business fail?"

"He insulted me, simply by not taking enough interest to get to _know_ me! I _hate_ him!" She ranted, standing and wandering around the room, as if she were lost. Her hands clenched and unclenched, looking for something to smash, but there was nothing breakable she could vent her anger on. "He called me insane!"

"Yeah, but how does this revenge thing work?"

Arian stared at Laguna blankly for a moment, then her arms relaxed and they fell back to her sides.

"Reputation is everything here." She explained. "If you do not have a reputation to build your business on, then you cannot build your business. No one will trade with you, it's as simple as that. It's the same for old established businesses. As soon as their reputation becomes questionable, they go down hill fast.

"My brother's associates soon stopped trading with him – if they had carried on, then people might have stopped trading with _them._ I made damn sure that they all knew I'd been thrown out onto the street. They all knew what I was. Some of them had known me for years, but they didn't help me. Not their problem, see? Didn't stop them from taking full advantage of what I was, did it?"

"How could they do that, if they had known you for so long?"

"You have some curious ideas, for a soldier. Surely you've seen some terrible things? Humanity isn't kind. Have you never wondered how people could do such things before?" She countered.

"Yeah." He said soberly. "We've seen some stuff, me an' Ward an' Kiros."

"It's human nature. It's a wonderful thing." She said sarcastically. "I hate it. But it helps with my revenge. It makes it a little easier for me."

"Revenge is part of human nature, too." He reminded her. "It doesn't mean anything once it's done. It's empty."

"Maybe. But right now I need it." Absolute honesty radiated out of her blue eyes, and for a moment so looked so lost that Laguna stood and walked over to where she had stopped, motionless, in the centre of the room.

"I shouldn't have dragged this out of you." He apologised. "It's nothing to do with me."

"No. It was good to tell someone. Someone who cares enough to ask, but won't be around tomorrow. It hurts, but perhaps it was something I needed." She conceded. Sighing, she thought for a moment. "People don't pay me to talk to them. I have a reputation to uphold, too."

Laguna, not quite catching on with what she meant, watched in amazement as her fingers flew down his shirt, undoing buttons. He caught her hands swiftly in his own.

"Hey. Um. No."

"You're really serious, aren't you?" she asked incredulously. "I didn't think you meant it before. This _is _novel." She smiled up at him. "Fate has a sense of humour, it would appear. I finally get a decent looking guy in here and… well, who would have my luck?"

"Isn't all this a bit of a betrayal? To your Gwydion?"

"Hell no." she said, amused. "I don't love anyone else. That is the only betrayal there could ever be."

"What do you want? What is it you wish for?" Laguna asked earnestly.

The light faded suddenly from Arian's eyes and she turned away.

"You and your bloody desire to get to know people! Now you've gotten my whole life story out of me, I thought you'd finished with the questions." There was a trace of bitterness in her voice.

"No, not quite. What do you dream of?"

"Gwydion." She said flatly. "You can't help me with that dream."

"There's nothing else?"

She paused. "People like me can't afford too many dreams. The disappointment is too great. But there is something. Just a notion, it's no more than that. For once, just once, I'd like someone to walk through that door who loves me. Even if I can't ever return it, just to be loved, for once. Just to have somebody here when I wake up. That's all." Arian sighed wistfully. "It would be nice. It would be a change."

"I don't love you," Laguna told her truthfully "but I can be here when you wake up. I can do that for you, but no more than that." 

"Why are you being so kind to me? Why are you taking this interest?" Tears gathered in her eyes and she bit her lip, raising one hand tremulously up to her mouth.

_Please don't cry, please don't cry! I don't know what to do when people cry. I hate it, it makes me unhappy too. Please don't cry._

"I don't know. I don't tend to think about why's too much. I just do things."

She wiped her eyes, before the tears had a chance to fall. "You'd really do that for me?"

"You make it sound like a trial!" Laguna laughed, dipping his head a little. "Your company isn't that bad!"

"It is. I'm melancholy and I've a slight penchant for melodrama. I'm terrible company." She admitted, then gave him a funny little half-smile. "You'll be here when I wake up? You promise?"

"Yeah."

***************

_Ow. I think my arm is dead. That or someone's hacked it off at the elbow._ Laguna woke slowly from a tangle of dreams and stared blankly at the golden-haired figure that lay on his arm.

_Ok, what did I miss?_

"I can be here when you wake up." His own voice echoed in his head and he remembered what he was doing here, exhaling with relief as he did so.

He lay there for a moment, noticing the light that filtered into the room was that unpleasant grey colour that meant rain. Just looking at it made him feel cold.

He curled up next to Arian, one arm draped over her waist. The words "paying customer" flitted through his mind and a thought struck him. Just as quickly he pushed it away.

_I can't believe I just thought that. _He berated himself, with a measure of disgust. _I can't be-_

The thought was abruptly severed when something cold hit the side of Laguna's face.

_Whatever that was, it was horrible and I probably deserved it_. He rolled his head and looked up at the ceiling. Water had started to drip through a crack and down onto his face. Trying to roll away from Arian, he found his arm was still jammed underneath her.

_She's heavier than she looks._ He thought as he tried to shift her slender frame without waking her. Finally succeeding he stood and flexed his hand, hoping to encourage blood to start flowing again, then looked around for something to stop the leaking ceiling.

The dripping water was now falling dangerously close to the sleeping girl. Laguna eventually resorted to wedging his socks into the crack to stop the leak. Noticing more water seeping in at various points around the room, he carefully placed his boots under the larger leaks.

_It's not far back. I can walk barefoot._ He figured, buttoning his shirt, absent-mindedly. Looking down, he suddenly realised that there was a buttonhole left that did not have a matching button._ Damn!_ He sighed and started again.

The sounds of dripping water seemed to have slowed up so Laguna opened the door, to see just how soaked he was going to get when he walked back to the hotel.

The heavy downpour had eased off to a light, misty drizzle.

"Hey! Hey you!" He turned in the direction of the voice and saw a short man, trying to pick his way through the mud. "Is the girl there? Arian?" he asked as he struggled across the alley.

Laguna glanced back in the doorway at the sleeping figure, reluctant to wake her up.

"No." He said, pulling the door shut behind him, so they wouldn't disturb her.

"Damn her!" The man muttered angrily. "When you see her, you tell her that her rent is due today."

"She _pays_ for this place?"

"Whaddya think, it magically sprung up out of the ground for her convenience?" He retorted.

"How much does she pay?" Laguna asked curiously and his eyes widened when the man told him. "This is a dump, there's no way it's worth that! How can she afford that sort of money, anyway?" he asked incredulously.

"She manages, the same as the rest do. And if she decides she don't wanna live here, there are others who would be happy to." The man turned to leave. "Just tell her I want that money."

"Wait." Laguna rifled through his pockets. _I can't give him the little amount of gil that I have – I owe her that. There must be _something_ I can… Oh, I wish I didn't have so much crap in here._

He eventually fished out a couple of items they had picked up from monsters on their way down here.

"These have got to be worth about the same amount. Will you take these instead?" _Kiros is gonna _murder_ me for this._

The man's face lit up briefly and he snatched the items away, leaving Laguna with a faint sense that he'd been ripped-off.

_Ah, what the hell._ He thought, wandering back inside. He dug his hand into his pocket and dumped the money he'd filched from Kiros yesterday onto one of the wooden surfaces, where she'd spot it. _I wish she'd get out of here. This must be the most wretched place that ever existed and I don't want her to live and die here, trying to achieve her revenge._

Arian was still sleeping, curled up under the blanket. Laguna moved to sit beside her, sighing heavily to himself. Her face was as relaxed as he had seen it, looking too young for her age. It was her eyes that made her face look so weary, when she was awake, he realised. They had seen too much and had an enduring, but fatigued look to them. She had been viciously disillusioned and she knew it.

"Who would want to be you?" He whispered. "I don't think there is anyone who would swap places with you." He brushed a hand across her cheek and in that instant her own hand flew up and caught his. Arian's clear blue eyes snapped open and a slight frown crinkled her forehead.

"Oh. It's you." She breathed quietly, as her mind gradually gathered recollections from the previous day, and she relaxed her grip on his hand. "Thank you." She smiled suddenly.

"No problem. But… I've kinda got to be getting back. Kiros is gonna have kittens if I take _too_ long to show up."

"There was someone else with you, I'm sure. Won't he mind?" Arian questioned.

"Ward? Nah. He doesn't look it, but he's really easy going. Kiros gets uptight, though." Laguna's grin quickly faded. "Look, I know you think staying here is important to you, but you'd be much better off in Deling or somewhere. There's so much you could do! You told me there was so much that you wanted from life, so start trying to grab hold of some of it!"

"No." she pulled herself up to a sitting position. "I can't do that. Maybe there is a lot I want to do, but making my brother's life unbearable is number one on that list. I have to stay here and see it through."

"It's not worth it."

"It is to me, and I'm the only one whose opinion matters." She smiled. "Go on. Get out of here, before your friend provides you with a menagerie." 

Laguna shot her a confused look.

"Before he has kittens!" She explained.

***************

"Ah, the wanderer returns." Ward grinned.

"So he's finally decided to grace us with his presence? About bloody time!" Kiros groused.

"Ah, come on. It's not like you would leave without me." Laguna protested to the unimpressed look Kiros was directing at him.

"We were thinking about it."

"It doesn't matter what you say Kiros, I _know_ you wouldn't do that." Laguna said confidently.

Kiros gave him another look that quite distinctly said "Oh, wouldn't I?" but refrained from answering – until he happened to glance down.

"Where are your boots?"

Laguna shrugged, feeling a little awkward. "Doesn't matter. We've got a spare pair, somewhere."

"How could _anyone_ lose their boots?" Ward asked, perplexed.

"I didn't lose them, I just…"

"Lost them?" Kiros laughed. "Spare's are in there." He pointed to a pack.

"Well, I think we can go home, probably to Kiros' relief." Laguna shot a grin at his friend, as he pulled on the boots he'd fished out of the pack. "There haven't been any raids on this place, not that you'd notice if there had been, and that's pretty much all we needed to know." 

"I don't know about Esthar raiding this town, but _I'd_ like to torch it." Kiros muttered darkly. He brightened up a bit. "I could, you know. We could say it was Esthar, no one'd know."

Ward frowned at him and Kiros shook his head in defeat. "Oh well, it was just an idea."

They walked down the stairs and out onto the street, the drizzle having long since turned to a kind of hazy sunshine that did little to brighten up the drab colours of the town.

"So Laguna," Kiros asked apprehensively. "How long do you reckon it'll take us to get home?"

"Not long. See, I think I've worked out a short cut…"

"It's going to be a _long_ journey." Ward sighed as Kiros looked up at the sky in despair.

"Laguna! Wait a sec!" Laguna spun round to see Arian racing up the street.

"Hey Ward. Isn't that the girl we saw yesterday who…"

"Yep."

"How intriguing." Kiros gave Laguna a politely interested look.

"Leave it, Kiros." Laguna shot back.

"I didn't say anything!"

"You don't have to. Some of your remarks are beginning to get predictable." Ward told him.

Arian finally reached them and held something out to Laguna. "Your boots." She explained. "You left them behind. I emptied the water out."

Kiros gave her a blank look at that statement and shook his head. "I don't think I want to know."

"Ah, this would be your friend with the kittens." She smiled brightly.

Laguna chuckled. "Not yet, but I think he's working on it."

"Kittens? What the hell are you talking about?"

"Don't worry about it, Kiros." Laguna turned back to the girl, pleased to get one up on Kiros, for a change. "We'll probably be back here, sooner or later. They're making us trek all over the place at the moment."

"I _hope _not." Ward commented.

"You won't come back here. No one ever does, not if they have the choice and I can't say I blame them." Arian said bluntly. She sighed and let a smile settle on her face again. "Goodbye Laguna. Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

"Does that actually narrow it down?" Kiros asked blandly.

"Not noticeably!" She grinned and turned back down the street.

"Home, then?" Ward asked.

"Yep." Laguna nodded.

Kiros sighed and rolled his eyes. "I guess we'll get there eventually – after we've toured most of Galbadia."

***************

They had talked for some time, about anything and everything, and now there was a silence, a lull in the conversation.

"You're still managing, then?" Laguna asked finally.

"The same as I always did." Arian nodded. "One day after another, no matter what. There are too many things that I simply cannot bear to be without. The sun on my face and the way the wind brushes past, those have too powerful a hold on me. There is so much that I still want to do." She tilted her head on one side and smiled, a little sadly. "I should really be leaving now."

"You're going back to Timber?"

"Yeah. Things have a way of getting out of hand when I'm not around to settle them. Hopefully things will quieten down there soon, what with the current negotiations with Galbadia. Once they get their independence, they won't have anything to fight about."

"You could stay here, you know. I'm sure I can find you a job around here someplace." Laguna grinned. "Nothing too taxing, I promise."

Arian thought for a while, her eyes clouding as her mind wandered down that path. She shook her head. "No. Not right now. I don't want to have to stay in one place for too long. There's too much that I want to see. But maybe… in a couple of years… I'll turn up again and take up that offer, if it's still open."

"It will be." Laguna assured her, brushing his hair back from his eyes.

The door opened, interrupting the conversation, and Kiros walked in. He didn't really notice Arian, and headed straight to Laguna.

"Odine wants you to sign this."

"What is it?" Laguna asked, trying to catch a look at the piece of paper his friend waved at him.

"I don't know. I just told him I'd hand you this to stop him from yelling at me in that awful accent of his." Kiros stopped, bewildered, and stared down at the table. "_Why_ is there a pair of socks on the table. No, wait, I don't want to know. I really _worry_ about you sometimes." He shook his head, completely baffled, and walked out, muttering something about his friend and his lack of sanity.

"How gratifying to be remembered." Arian laughed dryly.

"He's got a lot to think about." Laguna shrugged. "Him and Ward do so much around here."

"I thought _you_ were supposed to run the place?"

"Can you imagine the mess I'd be in if they just left me to it?" He leaned back in his chair as she stood up to leave.

Remembering some of the things she'd heard, Arian paused for a moment. "I heard a lot about what happened to you, how you got here and everything." She started slowly. "I don't know what to say to you about that. But I think that perhaps you understand me now, better than you did back then."

"No." Laguna admitted. "I still don't understand you at all. I don't think I ever will."

"Perhaps it's better that way." She conceded softly. "As much as I would like someone to understand, it would probably scare them too much." Her face was saddened for an instant, but it quickly brightened as another thought occurred to her. "Do you mind if I visit, from time to time? To talk to someone who doesn't try to make me into something else, but knows who I am. I don't think that made sense, but you know what I mean. It's… nice. Oh, I hate that word, it's too vague!"

Laguna laughed at Arian's annoyance with herself and nodded. "Sure. Why not? It's not like I actually _do_ a lot around here."

"I'll see you some other time, then." She grinned suddenly. "No kittens yet?"

"Not yet, Arian! I think that if I haven't driven him that far yet, then I never will!"

She lifted her hand in farewell and pulled the door closed quietly behind her, leaving Laguna to wonder how it was possible for someone to change so much, and yet remain completely the same.

#### The End

Ok, it's me. I'm back! So, what did you think? It wasn't _too_ bad, was it? Just very odd, but then, that's me in a nutshell. I had a murderous time trying to find something to tack on the end of this, but I finally settled on this. It seems appropriate for the Arian in the story.

Cause I know he's out there somewhere

Just beyond my reach

Though I've never really touched him

Or ever heard him speak

Though we've never been together

We've never been apart

No we've never met

Haven't found him yet

But I know him by heart

By Paul Williams and Jon Vezner


End file.
